Autumn in Trentino: Folgaria

newborn baby sleepingIt’s time for another flying visit to Trentino, my favourite place in Italy as Evan is going to be christened this weekend and I am going to be there.

It’s with mixed feelings that I leave as on one hand I must leave Paul and the twins behind in the UK but on the other I shall be free to enjoy Tommy and Megan and their families without any distractions. Of course I wish I could share the lovely things I will see and do with all of my family together but needs must so excuse me whilst I get very excited all over again.

My suitcase is stashed to the hilt with toys for Gracey, presents for Evan, lots of clothes for me as I can’t make up my mind what to take and it looks like rain too but of course my few belongings will rattle around empty on my return trip on Monday.

I’m taking my camera, my video camera and my laptop with me plus my brand new G Drive slim where I have now transferred all of my iPhoto library, you know I never used to be this gadget orientated but look at me now how I move country..

The autumn is a great time for wild mushrooms in Trentino and I hope to fit in a risotto or side order of funghi. I also have a pizza high up on my list, a Crodino which you never see here, an espresso (proper one) some mountain photography if the weather plays ball and a slice of strudel. They also make a wicked Sacher torte.

Folgaria in pictures

It’s big wine season too and I shall do my best to try a Marzemino which is typical to the area of Trentino, a Pinot Grigio, a Pinot Nero and a must-have Gewurztraminer. You know when I lived out there, I did the first course on my way to being a somelier and we used to hold wine tastings for our hotel guests.

I shall be visiting the ‘kids’ in the Alpen Eghel hotel and I’ve been booked in for a manicure on Sunday morning.

folgaria night

I shall meet with my best mate and chat too much, drink too much and probably spend too much in her Benetton shop too but it’s got to be done, a fill up until next time we meet which will most likely be the wedding in March.

Don’t know if you can tell but I am really looking forward to being there and you’ll hear all about it on Tuesday, love to all and have a great weekend – I will!

Gracey’s Christening

Of course I couldn’t not tell you about it could I?

Booked for the 20th at 11.30am, bang in the middle of our holiday and I had bought beautiful summer dresses for the girls to wear and a light summery thing for me too. I wanted to make sure we looked the part – as you do.

It was pouring down. In fact it had been pouring down for most of that week. The rain had not stopped all night and definitely showed no signs of slowing down soon so I went through the suitcases to see what on earth we could all wear. I had also left Paul’s shirts hanging in the wardrobe back at home having completely forgot about them when packing! 

Anyway, the girls were easy, trousers, t-shirts and cardigans with plimsoles but I was a totally different case. I hadn’t planned for torrential rain and only had white linen trousers to go up a cold mountain in and traipse through muddy wet roads. Luckily I had a white cardigan that would make some sort of outfit.

Nana Mari and Gracey bella

We parked outside the church and the other guests started to arrive, some I knew and was very pleased to see, others I didn’t know but was pleased to meet and there was no sign of Enrico.

We made our way over to the church, Paul watched the girls as they ran up and down the long church aisle laughing with glee and I sat and watched the mass. I had no role in it but was pleased that Tommy had been chosen to be a godfather and enjoyed watching him cherish this responsibility.

The mass ended, photos were taken and we said our goodbyes. All of the guests were invited back to Hotel Alpino for drinks and a sumptuous three course meal and Paul, I and the girls were eating in the restaurant opposite! The outcasts. Non desiderate.

Megan was very embarrassed about the situation as was Thomas and a few of the family members were upset but that was how it was going to be.

We ate in Ristorante dell Ugo, my friend Alessia’s family run business, and we had an excellent meal joined by my best friend Enrica. Tommy and Meggie came over to check on us and on one occasion Megan mentioned that her father had said he was sorry.

She said that when they had spoken earlier that week, Dad had burst into tears saying he couldn’t bear to see me, hence tugging at Megan’s heart-strings.

What he failed to mention and I have since gathered that extensive work is being carried out on the hotel. Plans that go back to when we were still a couple and having cried victim throughout the whole of our divorce procedure to get away with paying as little as possible he now was investing stupid amounts of money in this hotel AND he’d bought a new hotel earlier this year just up the road.

But do you know what?

I couldn’t care less about his money and his hotels. I am now free of him and his lies and can get on with my own life which I am really enjoying. I was never this happy with him but it pisses me off that he will twist the plot to always be the victim, the hard done by, the poor daddy.

So that was Gracey’s christening. 

Gracey if you read this one day, we were there, we made the effort but granddad’s stupidity and immense ego prevented us from joining in the party.

Funny how fate always has its own plan though…after going to such lengths to avoid seeing me we went into a bar later in the afternoon to get the girls a snack and he had to walk past us to get out. 

I’ll never be rid of my ex

Travelling with 3 under twos

You may remember we’re off to Lake Garda in June for 17 days. We specifically chose that area to be close to Megan and Gracey and be able to spend more time with them and I’m really looking forward to it.

Megan decided to have Gracey’s christening whilst we are there to avoid us all having to come over once again or worse, miss out on the occasion. She phoned me a month ago and asked me on the phone if I would be ok in the same room as her dad as she wanted to avoid any conflict in front of her guests.

Understandable and I pointed out that I was perfectly fine being in the same room as him but that it was her father who had the problem. He was the one that needed to be asked. She knew this but admitted that it was so difficult speaking to her father without him going off on one that she wanted to try first with me. I am the easier option.

I assured her I would be fine, I reminded her that I am perfectly happy with Paul and that I had absolutely no need to speak or see her dad. I would stay out of his way but was also quite happy to talk to him should the occasion rise. I’d make sure her day was memorable for all the right reasons.

Paul wasn’t so happy at giving up a ‘beach’ day for a ‘church thing’ but would drag himself along for the love of Megan who he gets on very well with.

On her recent trip the Christening was brought up, the arrangements, the reception, could I buy Gracey her christening gown and so on. It turns out that dad has had a turn around since (That’s a surprise! – not. He’ll probably have another ten changes of mind between now and then) and when Megan said I would be there with Paul and the girls as discussed, he replied that in that case he wouldn’t be at the reception, which is being held in his hotel.

Can I say the word ‘arsehole’ here without offending anyone?

I could say a lot more but I won’t, I will contain myself as this is my ex at his very selfish best.

I agreed with Megan that to make sure her day was special we would go to the church service and then clear off so dad wouldn’t be offended with my presence. (Idiot)

The next day after a lot of thought I approached Megan again and asked, was it worth us coming all that way at all? I mean the service with twins will be hard work, we’ll probably be outside more than inside and seeing as her dad was so adamant at not seeing me, we wouldn’t be missed. Maybe the rest of the family feel the same way too?

Her response was tears. She wants us there and in the photos so when Gracey looks back she knows we made our contribution. She realises her dad is totally out of order but no one can speak to the man because if someone did he would let all hell loose on that person and turn it round so he was the victim.

Little does this man know that his emotional blackmail over the years has indelibly signed our two children so deeply they are and always will be traumatised and he is too bloody minded and egotistical to ever question himself.

I couldn’t give a monkeys’ if it’s me he wants to hurt. Go ahead. Sticks and stones. But by constantly hurting my children he makes me seethe with anger. Something I thought was long gone.

The sad outcome of this is that I will always have this wretched man in my life as we are both important figures to our children. They love us both equally regardless of who is ‘right’ and who is ‘wrong’.

It’s an even harder task than the one David Cameron has on his hands I’m afraid and I’m not sure we’ll ever get there but where there’s a will there’s a way.