Twins at school – separate or keep them together?

twin sistersFour years!

Almost four years have passed since our twins came into the world and we’ve already chosen (and been accepted) at their first school. We have our first meeting on the 21st June where we’ll be told about the induction process, uniform and various other bits of information that make up the schools here in the UK.

In fact once accepted into the school of our choice there was a form (the first of many I imagine) to fill in and on it a small box where we could place any particular good friends name’s in the hope they may find each other in the same class. Unanimous decision for our girls was Hannah their ‘best friend.’ They met her on the first day of preschool last autumn and all three have stuck steadfast ever since. Which is lovely as if there is one thing I would want to wish my girls it’s good, strong, lifelong friendships which are hard to come by and harder still to keep.

It’s also at this stage of the process that we have to decide whether to keep the twins together or request they are separated into different classes.

It’s one of those decisions that you don’t take lightly and you are aware that either way you choose you could still be making the wrong decision.

My Paul is a twin and his mum took the decision to have them separated once they started school. This was because Paul’s brother would do all the talking for him and Paul was perfectly happy to not bother trying at conversation himself and lazily sit back and let his brother take over. Vera put her foot down and decided the boy needed to speak up for himself. Her decision worked for her and she was very pleased with the outcome.

In fact both Paul and I were thinking of carrying long in Vera’s footsteps and separating the girls at school to allow them both the freedom of singleton children. They could make their own friends, have their own teachers and start making their own life experiences but when it was time for us to look at our situation we saw that our twins were in fact very, very close. They would lean on each other and worked well as a team. One of the twins was also shyer than her sister and I felt she would struggle on her own even more so if her sister ‘got’ the best friend in her class too.

Could you imagine it? It would be a disaster. One of my girls would feel left out even if she did know plenty of other girls.

Mothers day card

I also drew on my past experience where Thomas at the age of 6, moving from scuola materna to scuola elementari, was separated from ALL of the friends he’d made and had played with for the previous three years. The decision was made based on where the children lived and I, too young to know any better, didn’t question the decision. I wish I had, I’ve wished it over and over again. Tommy found himself in a class of mainly girls which at 6 years old was not good. They weren’t interested in Batman or Ninja Turtles and Tommy there and then went right off school.

Don’t misunderstand me, he made lifelong friends in that class, many of his girl classmates are still in touch with him today but my burning question is ‘Would Thomas have done better at school if he’d been with his friends and in a more competitive situation?’ I think yes. A little friendly competitiveness goes a long way.

So we’re keeping our twins together for infant school, a decision that can be reviewed when the time comes to move up to junior school but in the meantime it does mean I can do parent’s evening in one go without having to queue up twice and the girls will continue to bond and strengthen their relationship too. It will also allow them to grow a little more and have maybe more input in the decision when the time comes.

Silent Sunday

playing with water

How do you control your kids?

butter wouldn't meltWhilst getting into the car one day last week we saw our next door neighbour, also out front, the usual niceties followed and the girls went over to talk too.

It was the Easter holidays and I imagine the noise from our house had been a few decibels higher over the previous 10 days to the normal quiet that reigns.

‘Hope they haven’t been too noisy these past few days’ I smile at my neighbour asking politely but knowing they’re not bothered by a bit of kiddy noise as they adore children thank goodness.

‘It’s not them I hear!’ came back the reply, with a smile and a laugh, a little friendly jesting shall we say?

‘Oh, you can hear me?’ I say and apologise with a smile bundling the girls into the car as we’re already running late.

No harm done, I know it was in jest and I laughed too but as I was driving along I thought about how I use my voice for parenting my girls and how I did in the past when Thomas and Megan were small too.

I find it works and it avoids threats of smacks which I don’t like to use. Thinking closely I use my voice in lots of different ways to look after my children, when they’re sad or poorly I use a softer quieter tone to comfort them. When I want them to play and have fun, my voice becomes all excited and enthusiastic to err them on to doing whatever I think is a great idea – this one doesn’t work when it comes to tidying their room though.

Then of course when they’re playing up, first I ask them to stop messing about, maybe ask them to calm down, stop hitting, don’t throw that toy, be nice … you get the picture.

If shortly after that hasn’t worked I raise my voice a couple of decibels to let them know I mean business and I drop the ‘asking’ so it’s more of a ‘I said..Stop that! Calm down! Don’t hit your sister! Don’t throw that toy!’

As we all know sometimes children don’t listen and continue as they were, maybe even laughing which is really annoying. So I start seeing red (it’s the Taurean bull in me) Now I am not pussyfooting around anymore I want peace back in my kingdom. I am the boss here and my orders will be obeyed so I raise my voice LOUDLY

STOP I SAID!

The new level and determination in my voice brings the two little people to an immediate standstill and probably from my expression they get it very quickly and start to cry loudly, together and they tell me

‘Stop shouting mummy you’re hurting my ears’

In the meantime it worked and I got them to sit up and take notice, what I wanted them to do has been achieved and now I must deal with the drawbacks of my clever parenting skill, the LOUD tears, they are so false but I need them to stop before we start disturbing the neighbours – or maybe I already have. Oh dear…

‘Shall we have a biscuit?’

Now that one works every time too.

Summer clothes for little people

Vertbaudet sent us some gorgeous pieces from their new Spring/Summer collection to review and what happened the weather turned cold and wet on us!

vertbaudet spring summer collection 2012

But being mum to two very inquisitive little madams ‘That’s a pretty dress mummy, is it for me?’ I couldn’t keep the items hidden for too long so I decided to do a ‘fashion show’ indoors.

vertbaudet dress 2012

If you look at these pieces they really are for running around outside in when it’s warm and I can romantically see the photos I would have taken had the weather played ball, flowers, fields, running, you know the kind of thing.

But here’s what we did, and of course my models didn’t really obey when I said ‘play girls’ or ‘Look like you’re playing’ they’d turn round at me knowing I was trying to take photos and grin sillyly (sure that must be a word)

Disclosure – We were sent two similar t-shirts with groovy pictures on front and back, one pair of 3/4 length trousers which will be perfect for preschool and a gorgeous purple flower dress with a fabulous bow on the back  this will be perfect for summer parties and I had a peek in the catalogue and saw they do a plain purple one too, phew! Argument saved again.

Vertbaudet have children’s clothes for both boys and girls, they also sell products for children’s bedrooms too

Easter Egg Hunt with George Asda

George ASDA clothes for childrenA week or so ago I was asked if I would like to put together an Easter Sunday look for children from the George ASDA cllection? Well it was a no brainer as I LOVE the George range of clothes at ASDA, our wardrobes are full of gorgeous bits and pieces I pick up on a trolley run.

I was given £20 to spend ONLINE! I’ve never shopped ASDA online before so it was a new experience too. It’s ever so simple and of course the best bit is that you can find a larger selection online as the supermarkets can’t carry the entire range.

Having two girls I was going to have to share my money between the pair of them and again, this was no problem as the clothes are so reasonably priced. I chose them a dress each from the Girls Clothes section, after all the theme was Easter Sunday best and ever since I was a child we’ve always dressed up in something special on these occasions. My two LOVE dresses and these two I picked up for only £9.00 each. I can add a cardi on top, a pair of short socks and shoes and they’ll look fabulous and VERY Easter.

The best part of this blog post though is for you dear Readers  as I am 1 of 20 bloggers chosen to play the Easter Egg Hunt game Each blogger has been sent an undisclosed amount of Easter Eggs (the girls were VERY disappointed to find they contained no chocolate) View Post