I’d like to take the opportunity whilst I am on holiday to reblog some of my old posts, favourite posts that may have been missed and here is one of my favourite photos of Thomas and Megan probably spring 1994 judging by Tom’s missing teeth! A bittersweet day for me as you can read below

Meandering through the wonderful world of Blogs I went back to an old friend’s to see what she was up to and Lo and Behold a writing workshop…what a brilliant idea!

Now that was a week ago and I have missed the deadline – let’s blame the flu for now, but here I am back in the driving seat and prompt 4 shouted out at me as The One For Me – Togetherness

A while back I was sorting through my family albums going back 23 years and as it is impossible these days to keep them all I was sharing them out and making ‘Life albums’ for my two older children Thomas and Megan who now have lives of their own. Of course each photo held it’s own memory that was special in my heart and evoked an emotion deep within me but the one I am about to share was taken in roughly 1994 on the northern shore of Lake Garda in the beautiful town of Torbole.

It was a glorious May day, school wasn’t far off  from breaking up for the three month holiday the Italian children enjoy and Thomas, Megan and I were going to watch Megan perform in her first ballet dancing end of term show put on for proud parents and family.

The morning had been spent in the village hall for a last minute practice and now, on our lunch break we were on the Torbole promenade.  If you looked out over the vast expanse of water you could see the windsurfers zig zagging across the lake making the most of the cold Ora wind coming down from the Dolomites in the North. They added a rainbow of colour and movement as they powerfully surfed the surface.

Tommy and Megan were excited. They were spending a day that was different to usual and they were running about and laughing with each other, Megan looked particularly beautiful as I had taken her to the hairdressers that morning and her unwashed hair (apparently it’s easier with unwashed hair) was pulled back into a perfect ballet dancer’s bun and tiny white, cloth flowers had been gripped around the edge, her pretty little face was a picture in itself.

Tommy, my mischevious lad with a heart of gold, then 6 years old, was a flurry of movement. I had no idea where he got that energy from but he was dashing in and out of the crowd of tourists with his sister chasing him and laughing out loud. That bun was holding strong but for how much longer?

To any passer by it must have looked the picture of happiness and the three of us were truly enjoying our day together but once again Daddy wasn’t there to share it with us.

I don’t remember the excuse he gave for missing his daughter’s ballet show, he just didn’t deem it important enough for him to spare his precious time.

It broke my heart for me, for her and for Tommy and once again I faced the reality that this relationship was dead. Again I went over all of my sorry options in depth and again I came up with one, leave him and start again.

I knew with no doubt that sooner or later this would happen I just didn’t know how I would accomplish it all and without breaking my little one’s hearts.

Tommy was getting over excited as usual and a calm down was needed so I suggested ice creams and cheered on by the whoops and wows I led them to the parlour with the never ending fridge of tastes on the side road.

For the moment allowing myself to savour being together.

Don’t forget for many other Flashback Fridays head over to Karin at Cafe Bebe


  1. January 29, 2010 / 11:13 PM

    Hello Mari!

    So lovely to hear from you! And you have a blog too! Hope all is well with you and the family. I am horribly neglectful of facebook these days.

    Love your post, so evocative and beautiful but so sad too. It must have been an awfully hard break to make, you are very brave to have got through it all. And come through it with a whole new life too!

    Delighted you have taken part in the workshop. Just click here:
    and then scroll down to the McLinky form where it says ‘You are next’. Click and then enter the title of your post, and copy and paste the post’s URL from your address bar.

    Also, did you know that I run a writing community for women writers? Have been reading your ‘about’! Hope that you might find it really helpful to support you in your writing plans:

    Take care xxx

  2. romana
    June 3, 2011 / 7:49 AM

    Together but not together !? ..Bellissimi e molto teneri in questa foto..chissà se un loro pensiero andava al papà? comunque ogni cosa a suo tempo.. evidentemente avevi bisogno di altre “prove” ..spero a presto mari :-) un bacione ciao

  3. Tommy
    June 3, 2011 / 1:39 PM

    Bella foto , non me la ricordavo… come va..??? bella la vacanza..??

  4. Karin @ Cafe Bebe
    June 5, 2011 / 4:59 PM

    That is a very bittersweet tale…sigh. Thank you so much for sharing it. I hope that you’re enjoying your Italian sojurn and the memories are far happier than this one. :)


  5. megan
    June 7, 2011 / 8:53 AM

    hey mum tbh i can’t remember dad anywhere not one holiday or recita or anything else the only place i can remember dad is in the hotel,only came to my mind as i saw this blog, but for me it doesn’t matter because you n tom tom were there, and now that i know what a good dad does, by watching ale (anche se talvolta è OTT), i can say that dad is a big **********************************************!!!!!!!!!!!!

    love you mum xxxx

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