The Wreck of the Hesperus

A phrase I heard over and over whilst growing up. Mum used it to describe unkempt hair, dishevelled clothes and an unruly overall appearance. I got the message, she wasn’t pleased and I’d better do something about it – quick!

I just Wikipediad the wreck and found such a sad story but it does describe perfectly how I feel about my appearance lately. Lost and alone.

As a stay at home mum and one wage packet down, certain treats have taken a bashing since the girls arrived and the money I would spend on myself is one of our ‘savings’.

New clothes are a rarity these days but my passion for looking at them remains the same, the equation equalling a continuing burning desire for dresses, trousers, tops, bottoms, bags, shoes and every other trinket that makes us feel absolutely fabulous. I ‘know’ I don’t need it but that doesn’t make it any easier the ‘going without’. Alternatively I have become an expert at recycling stuff in my wardrobe….

I took a long, hard and critical look at my face only the other day. I have never used much make up at all preferring the ‘au nature’ look keeping make up for special occasions and night’s out when I usually brush my face in powder for a bit of colour, add some mascara and a bit of lippy. Job Done!

Now I see the ‘laughter lines’ around my eyes and creases in my cheeks…is it time to stop smiling and laughing? I use my beauty serum daily and a good day cream but maybe extra action is needed here? I would love to have a full make over with a professional make up artist. Trouble is I wouldn’t have the time for full make up every day. I have never done it and it would become something I begrudged as a time waster. No, I need a quick daily fix that can be applied in nano seconds and look wonderful with.

My hair is in desperate need of a good cut but the fact that I pin it up most days seems to ‘do’ for the moment. Then I look at the perfectly groomed women on TV and presented in magazines and my heart tumbles as I chide myself  ‘You really must do more!’ I need to spend more time on myself but there’s always something more engaging to do, ie My Blog, Facebook, Judith’s Room or British Mummy Bloggers

My hands are atrocious, dry and coarse from house work, a nice winter exzema extending over the thumbs and backs of my hands. I bought a few creams, I even went to the doctor but nothing seems to work. I want a posh manicure. Now!

My body. Oh dear… apart from a full MOT which I wrote about previously I need to lose half a stone, tighten up my twin tummy with abs abs abs and, moisturise my dry skin every single day which only comes to my mind when I’m fully dressed. (Why?) I signed up at the gym. The idea was to go twice a week leaving the girls in the crèche on site but they have fallen ill ever since!!! But I insist on persevering and went yesterday and hoping to go again on Thursday, fingers crossed.

I have wanted a boob job for as long as I can remember boobs being ‘important’ assets but I doubt I’d go under the knife as I’m such a wuss, lucky I’m not aspiring to be a page 3 girl eh?

So that is my current sorry state of affairs but instead of sitting back and wallowing in ‘Poor me’ I’m doing something about it. I started my MOT this very morning and went to the dentist for a check up, the 1st in two years – NO FILLINGS!!! yayyy and I’m booked in for a good clean in a couple of weeks. For the rest of your Brand New Mari…watch this space….

This was written for Josie’s writing workshop #13. I have chosen prompt 1. You may also enjoy Fear of the Unknown written for #12



  1. Heather
    February 16, 2010 / 5:48 PM

    that all sounds very familiar!

  2. Natural Mummy
    February 16, 2010 / 10:02 PM

    Thought it was just me with the cracked and chapped winter hands. Guess its a Mummy occupational hazard!

  3. jomiddleton
    February 17, 2010 / 8:49 AM

    Oh Mari, that all sounds horribly familiar, but remember even the women you see in magazines don’t look like that! Do you have some outfits you ALWAYS feel fab in? I quite often make myself feel good by dressing up really smart for Sainsburys. Make up counters will do you a free makeover and I once got a £5 haircut in Toni and Guy by a trainee – it takes ages but it’s worth it! xx

  4. February 17, 2010 / 3:26 PM

    Ah Jo, thanks for your tips!
    Yes I would love to put them into practice but I always have the girls with me in centers where I could get a make over and a long list of things to do – I always run out of time. But no worries, I just get on with it and play the lottery every now and then waiting for my massive win. I’ll get there, age is creeping along silently and all of a sudden it makes me catch my breath when I see the evidence but I’m a survivor…

    Heather – what can I say? Join the club!

    Natural mummy – the hand thing is a real nuisance and my doc won’t give me anything for longer than two weeks. It works but comes back really quickly. Even with just wiping the kitchen tops with a bit of product. I’m learning to be extra careful and wear gloves ALL the time. Oh and once the winter thing is over I start on hayfever :)

    Thanks for your comments ladies xx

  5. Mummy Zen
    February 17, 2010 / 5:01 PM

    I think it’s that time of year when we’re starting to come out of winter hibernation and realising spring is coming and we’ll soon be bearing more skin in the warmer weather. It makes us start thinking about our bodies and noticing all the areas that could do with some improvement! I know just how you feel :-)

    • February 18, 2010 / 1:59 PM

      Mummy Zen, you’re absolutely right! Spring is knocking at the door and I’m not ready yet, must get a move on!

  6. Crystal Jigsaw
    February 17, 2010 / 9:08 PM

    You sound perfectly human to me! Rarely do I wear makeup, and some days I don’t even bother to brush my hair. Some of these people on tv aren’t real. They spend hours and hours in a makeup room being pampered with powder puffs and probably forget what they actually look like “naturally”. Which to me, is the best way to be.

    CJ xx

    • February 18, 2010 / 1:57 PM

      You’re right, the good news is I am happier now looking like I do than I have been in a very long while :) Just the odd tweak wouldn’t go amiss

  7. jumblymummy
    February 18, 2010 / 8:44 PM

    never stop smiling, never stop laughing…. the lines are worth it.

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